Infertility, spared partners

Men rarely describe themselves and are rarely described by their partners as actors in the search for pregnancy: they get little involved and are kept away from daily temperature measurements. 

The argument put forward by women for not systematically informing their partner of the estimated ovulation date is the desire to preserve it and not to enter into a purely technical and mechanical procedure, whereas, paradoxically, they are, for their own sake part, in a process of programmed sexuality. 

Lucie (31, laboratory assistant), who has been looking for a pregnancy for two years, explains: "I don't talk to her about everything I do ... I don't say 'good, tonight is a good night'. No, because it's already a little bit… I know that sometimes it would be necessary, well I tell him enough so that he is aware and at the same time so that he is not too… not involved, this is not the case, but not too much… I cannot find my words… that it is not too much… Precisely it is more difficult… A man is also quite receptive to this kind of thing then, if I say to him “Bah tonight” or “such day, such day”, it will be a little bit, I think, a bit of a headache… for both of us!… ” 

Thus, from the early stages of the search for pregnancy, under cover of protection for the spouse, a certain sidelining of men is maintained. This female management of the pregnancy plan continues when the pregnancy does not come and the couple decides to involve the medical sphere, when making the first appointments. Faced with an unsuccessful pregnancy search or following miscarriages, couples decide to consult a specialist, usually the usual gynecologist. In the pathways analyzed, women are still frequently the first to be suspected of subfertility or infertility and the first to be affected by the recommended examinations.

Stéphane has been trying to have a first child for two years. Sabrina, his wife (31, senior executive), whom we also interviewed, says the couple have been trying for four years. The problem of infertility comes from him; he had the operation but the operation did not yield any results on the couple's fertility. He says: "My wife had, in fact, had a gynecologist who had let her understand at one point that there were perhaps some concerns about her (...) So, she wanted to control rather quickly. , at the end of not even a year, in fact, (…) we checked quite quickly and it turned out that in fact the worries came more from me ”. 

Sabrina explains that her gynecologist had “the intelligence” to recommend examinations to the two members of the couple: “And after a year, my gynecologist told me 'but, it's still strange”, she said. asked for tests, and she had the intelligence to say, that before completely torturing the woman, who is very muchoften to be incapacitated (...) I did the very basic tests ... blood, echo, well, really things not too invasive and not too painful and, at the same time, immediately, she had a test done to my husband ”.

Here is the french version of this article/ Voici la version anglaise de cet article: https://diplomacy-development.blogspot.com/2021/09/linfertilite-des-partenaires-epargnes.html

Cassien Tribunal Aungane, Editor